- I had my water broken
- Carina and my uterus were monitored continuously with an obnoxious device which made my contractions feel more painful
- I had a continuous IV and blood pressure monitor which made my arm fall asleep on occasion
- The epidural ended up being my best friend rather than feared enemy
- Pushing anywhere other than on my back was not an option, as I couldn't feel one of my legs
- I let them give me the shot to facilitate the detachment of the placenta
Looking back to those first few days after Carina's birth I feel sadness for myself, in that I wasn't able to realize that despite the fact that nothing went as I had hoped it would, everything was fine. My baby was healthy. I was healthy. I didn't have any complications. Nothing had been traumatic.
I spent the first few days of her life feeling bad about not being able to check off all of the bullets on my list. How sad is that? I guess the moral of the story is to have your preferences or 'wish list' but do not beat yourself up if things don't end up as you hoped. Easier said than done, right? :)