Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Closing the door on this, hopefully for good

It has been a while since I last updated on Carina's Failure to Thrive diagnosis. We had what was supposed to be our final appointment with the Pediatric Nephrologist a couple weeks before Aurelia was born. We had hoped she'd be released from his care at that time, but her meager weight gain wasn't good enough in his opinion. So? He ordered repeat blood work.

I fought him this time. I didn't want to put Carina through it again. She has been stuck with needles so many times now I have actually lost count. He insisted, and said this would be the last time. If her blood work came back normal, he would drop it. And it did. Phew.

In addition to normal blood work, Carina has actually gained a bit of weight since her appointment! She was 22 lbs. 2 oz. at Aurelia's 2 week appointment a month ago. I am eager to see if that number increases at the next Pediatrician visit at the end of the month.We do have {what should be} one final follow up on December 10th. I am so eager to close the door on this, and I'm sure Carina is, too.

Carina is not impressed with your unfounded diagnosis
Yes, she is at the bottom of the growth charts, but she has hit all of developmental milestones. She's talking up a storm and loves letters and numbers and colors. She IS NOT the face of failure to thrive and I hate that effing diagnosis and the pain it has caused her and the stress and frustration it has brought to all of our lives.

I hate that I feel the need to check her weight constantly. Every few weeks that go by with no increase make me feel like a failure all over again. Despite everything I tell myself, I still have a hard time not equating the numbers on the scale with my value as a Mother.

So can we be done with this? Yes? Okay, good.

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