Mommas who Inspire me - Our Growing Garden

I have been super busy with my Mom here in town, so today I present a post written by Kristin from Our Growing Garden as the next installment in the Mommas who Inspire me series.  This post really spoke to me and I would speculate that there are oodles of ladies out there who can relate to it.


You may already be familiar with Kristin from Our Growing Garden, as her and I are quite close and I mention her often, in addition to hosting our weekly Toddle Along Tuesday blog hop together.  We have known each other since back before we got pregnant, and I have been reading her blog since then as well :)

Believing in my Self Worth

I always thought I would be super-wife and super-mom. I am so super not. I thought fulfilling my wifely duties such as cooking, cleaning, ironing, etc would be a breeze. I'll enjoy doing it because I'll be MARRIED and live in my own house! It will be FUN said my eager 21 year old heart. Well, once you have been married for awhile, you come to the realization that marriage is not always a bed of roses, requiring more work and compromise than you imagined, and living in your own big house comes with a mortgage and even more upkeep. Throw a baby in to the mix, and there is so much that needs you and so little of you to go around that feelings of inadequacy start to creep in the corners of your mind.

the inside of my laundry cabinet. This is only a little crazy, right? :p

I think as a mother, I have sort of taken the "crunchy" route. I breastfeed. I wear my baby in a wrap. I make homemade fruit and vegetable baby foods. He wears lots of organic clothing. But I feel like I am not the complete crunchy package. I don't cloth diaper (well, as of present day, that has changed ;). I don't co-sleep. I have started buying more and more processed baby foods. I give him juice. I use Windex. And I feel guilty. Ridiculous, right? In my head I KNOW I'm a damn good mom. I breastfed through an elimination diet for months, restricting myself of most things with major proteins and taste for that matter, to keep my baby's allergies at bay. And that took a tremendous amount of will power (and if I mention it in every other post from here on out, I'm not sorry). I play with him, read to him, show him things the entire time he is awake. I rarely take a moment for myself. Yet, I still feel inadequate. Probably because I set up unattainable goals of absolute perfection in my head. 

And being a wife? I feel like a big fat fail. (disclaimer: my husband does nothing to make me feel this way). It has nothing to do with the emotional aspect of marriage. I nurture our relationship with plenty meaningful ways. It's the wifely duty things. The cooking, okay, well never mind it's not the cooking...hubs called me an incredible cook today. ::takes a bow:: It's the cleaning, and the ironing, the mopping, the laundry, the sweeping, the vacuuming- scratch that- I freaking love to vacuum- the dusting, the butt-patting (I could be more empathetic- ironic since I just called empathy "butt-patting", no?) I just don't like doing it, but sometimes I love it. Confusing? I have such an ALL OR NOTHING personality that if this house isn't looking like a Pottery Barn spread including twinkles from the super clean floor, then it's going to look like a tornado hit it. Twice. And then I feel like crap ...because I left out a glass of apple juice for so long that it grew mold spores. (I know. It was an accident though) But the fact that my husband found it...I instantly think how in the hell does he put with me? I suck. 

the guilt spurning wreckage that makes me pull my hair out.

How and why do I let these things happen? Why can't I find a balance in between being mother, wife, and finding time for me? My husband told me today that I am so task oriented that if I don't have a list of things to check off, that I have no clue to do with myself. SO SO true. I can honestly say, I do not know how to relax. I feel like sometimes I am everything (mom, maid, great cook, social) and then nothing (lazy, introverted, lazy, lazy...EXHAUSTED). 

see? task oriented indeed. 

Once I saw a picture that said, "A clean house is a sign of a wasted life." I say a clean house is a sign that I didn't spend enough time with my baby today. But we can't live in a dump, ya know? It's all about finding balance and I have NO idea how to do it. And I need to quit equating my worth as a mother with how much weight James gained in a month or if he has accomplished whatever milestone by this time frame. And I need to quit equating my worth as a wife with how many times I cooked this week, or how clean the house is.

...I'm crazy aren't I? Just say it. 

But seriously, I need to work on juggling all my responsibilities and knowing that it is okay that I am not perfect at all of them. And if I perfection is not feasible (which I know good and well it isn't) that it is OKAY and it doesn't mean that I should jump ship on the entire task, whatever it may be, or feel like a bad mom or bad wife. 

I am a good mom. And a good wife. I just need to believe it.

Thanks for reading! Feel free to check out more at Our Growing Garden.

Mommas who Inspire me - Froggy and the Mouse

We still have family in town, so I am bringing you the next installment of the Mommas who Inspire me series. Today I introduce to you Tottums from The Froggy and the Mouse.


Tottums is my hero. She has a full time job, two adorable little boys, and somehow finds the time to blog (and look fantastic, by the way). I read her blog religiously because I love the Momma-of-boys perspective.

Jocks vs. Nerds

I read a really GREAT ARTICLE today. An article that I think a lot of parents should take note of, whether they're raising boys or girls (or both).

As a boy mom, it's inevitable that more than likely, at some point in their life, my kids are going to become obsessed with sports. I am ready and willing to accept this. I know that at some point my weekends are going to be filled with soccer games, tee-ball practices, and swim meets. I know that soon, all of my extra money (lol at 'extra money') will go to football pads, and running cleats, and cups. CUPS. And really, I'm okay with that.

Here's the thing though, I live in Texas. And while I love my state (as any decent Texan does) here's how things work: if you are a boy, you're almost EXPECTED to be an athlete. Friday Night Lights is not a myth, that's how things work here. If you want to be anybody in the middle school/high school/college social hierarchy, you need to play sports, and more specifically, you need to play football. If you don't, well, then you're a nerd. A dork. And even worse, a nobody. And not just to the other kids, to a lot of adults as well.

Every time I turn on the news these days I hear about the crappy state our classrooms are in. How there are 30+ kids to a teacher. How our text books are being written by POLITICIANS. And hell, I can barely talk to my mother these days (who works for a school district in San Antonio) without her ranting about our governor and his crappy budget cuts and lack of education spending. Yet somehow, school districts can spend $60 MILLION on a high school football stadium (no really, a school near us is in the process of building one).

I have no delusions that I can change how things of this nature work in our school systems and society before my boys become old enough to understand them. It starts SO early. From the moment you realize you're having a little boy, and visit the baby boy clothing area in any store, and get to choose between a onesie that says, 'Daddy's little All-Star' or 'Number One Slugger!'. Hell, tee-ball starts at THREE YEARS OLD here ... so to a lot of people, the Mouse needs to start playing tee-ball and flag football NOW if he wants the edge. My kid, the kid who can't even sit through an entire episode of Dora the Explorer, should be taught how to catch a ground ball and sit in a dugout and wait for his turn to hit, and then go sit in the dugout again after his three chances to hit the ball.

(insert hysterical laughter here)

Admittedly, I am not the most athletic person in the world (understatement of the year). For a while, I was a swimmer (50m Free in 30.78 right here, yo!) while in high school ... but that only lasted as long as I could participate in swim team, and still be in band. I have no grand illusions that my boys have received any type of athletic gene from me. I hope they've received my passion for reading. My love of writing. My husband's love of music. And both of our artistic abilities. But neither one of us has any astounding athletic skills we're passing on here.

This doesn't mean I don't want them to play sports. There's nothing wrong with sports. In fact, I think they're a great confidence booster and help kids develop a lot of skills (like sportsmanship and team play) ... but they will never be a top priority in our household. I want there to be a good balance between the two. I want my kids to come and ask me to read them a book, and then go outside and play catch with each other. I want them to bring home 1st prize from their science fair, and then run out the door for soccer practice. I want them to realize that even though they are absolutely inundated with the idea that in order to be anybody who is worth anything, you must be a 'jock' - that this is not the case. That they are worth more and can do more with their lives than even the best sports 'heros' can.

So the next time you need to buy a little boy a gift ... and can't think of what to get him ... buy him a book. Buy him a butterfly kit. Buy him some paint and construction paper. Buy him a puppet. I promise, he already has enough footballs.

Thanks for reading! Feel free to check out more at The Froggy and the Mouse.

Mommas who Inspire me - The How to Mommy

Today I bring you the first of a new series - Mommas who Inspire Me.  This isn't going to be a weekly series or anything (I think I have enough weekly posts haha) but for times when I am on vacation or really busy, I thought it would be nice to share with you some of the blogs I read and love.  We'll start with a friend of mine, The How To Mommy.  I hope you enjoy!



I am The How To Mommy. I am not a professional, just a mom who loves to pass on tips and tricks to make our busy lives a little easier, one post at a time. I frequently blog about saving money, new and favorite recipes, how to get healthy, as well as tips on parenting.

I'm the mom of two little girls and they were very much the inspiration for the post I'm sharing with you.

How To Appreciate The Little Things

Recently, I was reading a Yahoo! article on the Top 50 Things I Love About Being a Mom.

So many of her items really hit home for me.

Along from being well written and humorous, I really loved the article because it made me stop and think about all the little things that happen everyday that make life so wonderful.

I thought I'd share some of my top things I love about being a mom.

• How polite strangers have become once they see you toting around 2 kids
• Free samples at the grocery store (how would we ever get grocery shopping done without them?)
• How a sick toddler, who never sits still for anything, will cuddle on the couch with you for hours
• Being greeted with a huge, toothless grin every morning when you take your baby out of the crib
• Hearing your child learn how to say "mommy"
• Watching your child accomplish something on their own (their first steps, their first time using a utensil, etc.)
• How my kisses make everything better
• Mother's Day
• Drive Thru banks, coffee, restaurants (basically anytime I don't have to haul kids in and out of the car to complete an errand)
• Listening to your newborn breathe as they sleep peacefully on your chest

I'm sure there are a million more, but these came to mind first! What am I missing? What are your favorite things about being a mom?

Thanks for reading! Feel free to check out more at The How To Mommy.