Back to basics & the truth about my lackadaisical blogging

I haven't yet been extended beyond my contract's current end date - September 27th. According to everyone on my team, they are lobbying for me to stay but apparently it's up to leadership and what the budget allows. My boss has been encouraging me to work as much as possible and since I'm hourly, I have obliged. 

The truth is...after living on such a tight budget for so long and knowing that the end of this infusion of money is in sight, I feel like a hoarder. I'm working as many hours as I can before it runs out. After the girls go to sleep, I open up the computer and work for an hour or two. When they're napping on the weekend, I work.

I'm tired. I want to blog, or relax, or clean (ha who am I kidding...I don't want to clean, but I need to) but I end up working instead. I think part of this anxiety driven because I can't entirely pinpoint what's making me feel this compulsion...

So yeah, I think it's pretty obvious I haven't been blogging much :)  I miss it and I'm having Twitter & Facebook withdrawal. I'm not able to get on during the workday and then since I've been absent, it seems overwhelming once I get home because I've missed so much. Working Moms who blog and spend time on Social Media, how do you manage this?

Another thing contributing to my anxiety is the business side of blogging. I'm getting rid of most of my ads leaving only a handful of small ones, and then the rest will be swaps. I love doing {free} swaps with you and welcome blogs of any size and type. Okay maybe not any type...those who detail their Karma Sutra exploits in graphic detail need not apply. Really, those blogs exist. I'm not even sure why I know that...

But I digress. I'm also still not taking on any further sponsored posts, but I have a few that I promised months ago (sorry!) that I haven't yet finished. So please bear with me while I get them done. I am so thankful for the opportunities that this blog has given me but it's time to focus on the girls and my {continued} progress on the anxiety front.

I'm looking forward to getting back to basics.

Blogging about blogging (sorry!)

I read two blog posts earlier this week (here and here) that really spoke to me. They prompted me to rethink some of my procedures when it comes to blogging, social media, and sponsorship.

As a result of some reflection in the wake of these posts, I will be following suit and will no longer accept sponsorship from bloggers. It's not that I don't love reading blogs (because I do) or sharing posts I enjoy (again, I do), it's that I want to tweet/link/share/promote posts because I enjoyed them, not because someone paid me to. I certainly don't judge or think ill of anyone else who promotes other bloggers in exchange for money, it just isn't what I want to do anymore. I'll share when I read something that I think is awesome...and I won't expect anything in return.

If you are a blogger and currently have an ad with me, it will remain until the end of your term. This is just a from here on out change. In lieu of charging, I've opened swap spots once again. If you're interested in swapping ads on our blog sidebars for one month, head to my Sponsor page. I'll also be resurrecting my Blog Roll (which needs an update, badly...sorry) for blogs that I regularly read and love.

I've also made some changes to my ad packages, including lowering prices slightly and morphing my monthly sponsor post into a group giveaway (note: no changes will be made for existing sponsors).

I think this is a step in the right direction for me. I've made some blogging decisions in the past that {in retrospect} I'm not proud of or didn't sit well with me for whatever reason. I hope you'll bear with me as I continue to try to figure out what's right for my little geeky corner of the interwebs :)

Bringing Toddle Along Tuesday back

I miss my Toddle Along Tuesday posts. It seems that you miss them, too. Or at least the number of you who e-mailed me or messaged me asking me to bring it back, do :)

As of this coming Tuesday we're back in action! But no co-hosts (for now), and no pre-determined scheduled time. I'll post it either Monday night or Tuesday morning...whenever I can.

Our first topic will be Mommy Pet Peeves! What things do your kids, husband, or other people do that really bug you? Thanks for this topic idea, Mommy in the Midwest! I think it should be fun.

ERMAHGERD TAT'S BACK!

Can't wait to read your posts. And if you have any ideas for topics, please let me know!

All the things I'd rather be doing than blogging

As I've been feeling better and better lately when it comes to my anxiety, I have been experiencing something I never thought would happen...

Most days I don't feel like blogging. 

Since I no longer have the attention span of a toddler, I've been throwing myself into hobbies I've shelved for too long:

• Reading: I'm embarrassed to admit that prior to starting my anxiety medication, I had only read two books since before Carina was born...just after Christmas of 2010. Now, in the two short months since Christmas 2012 I have read five and I'm eager to read more. I think I'm going to splurge and use a little of our tax refund money to buy myself an e-reader. If you love yours, I'd appreciate your recommendations.
• Genealogy: 4 years ago (almost to the day!) Mike and I went to Montgomery County Court House in Norristown, Pennsylvania to obtain our marriage license. With it, they gave us a blank family tree on pretty paper. It inspired me to begin looking into our ancestry. I spent hours upon hours researching both of our families on the internet and was devastated when my computer crashed and I lost all of it. With the help of Ancestry.com, I'm getting back in the saddle and I've already found some really cool things about some of our ancestors. More to come on this soon!

Similarly, after a couple years of not being able to sit still through a whole hour long show, I'm enjoying watching TV with Mike again. We made it through almost all 3 seasons of Downton Abbey in about two weeks. We're also working on Fringe, which we abandoned near the beginning of Season 4 because it coincided with Mike's thesis defense and our move and we were crazy busy.

We're finally getting the remaining boxes unpacked, the apartment decorated, and Aurelia's crib set up in the nursery. Things are coming together. And I feel less and less like sitting in front of the computer screen, tapping away at the keyboard.

A handful of times over the last few years I've mentioned that blogging has been my saving grace, helping me to stay sane while things were otherwise {seemingly} falling apart. The more I reflect, I'm beginning to wonder if it has actually exacerbated my anxiety rather than alleviate it. Because the more I step away from the blog and social media, the happier I find myself. At least for now.

This definitely isn't a goodbye. I guess it's more of a I haven't been around as much and here's why. I'll still be writing, just probably less often.

In the grand scheme of things, I think having too much fun doing other things is a pretty good place to be.

I think the meds are working or else I would have lost my mind this weekend

Our weekend opened with one of those calls you dread getting: Mike's Grandfather was in surgery, and would not likely survive. We all but packed up to drive down to Philadelphia.

Then Friday evening I was notified by a reader about the creepy photo stealing and Facebook profile impersonating me. Upon viewing the fake profile for the first time my stomach instantly knotted and I thought I was going to lose my dinner all over the computer screen. Seeing my child being portrayed as someone else's elicited wrath within me I didn't know existed. When I saw the page that one of my friends referred to as "a shrine to murdered toddlers" with Carina's photo directly underneath all of the deceased children, I FREAKED. I went from angry to scared to a rather potent -- and if you were here in the room with us -- tangible combination of both.

Saturday morning Carina felt a little warm but I didn't think much of it. Later in the afternoon she became lethargic (which isn't like her at all) so I checked her temperature and was shocked to see 103.5 °F. She was miserable, wouldn't eat or drink, slept terribly, and was up at 3:30 AM Sunday morning and would not go back to sleep. Mike had to work, and the girls staggered their naps so I was awake from that ungodly hour onwards without a chance to nap.

Despite all that, I managed to keep my cool all weekend. There wasn't even a single instance when I felt really anxious. Mad, frustrated, upset, exhausted? Sure. But there was never any sense that I was going to lose it. So I conclude that the medication might be working?

And more good news all around: Mike's Grandfather made it through surgery and is recovering, Carina was feeling 100 times better today, and both the creepy Facebook page that had Carina's photo AND the impersonator profile are gone.

After your encouragement and some thinking I've decided not to be driven off. Instead? I'll be watermarking and will dish out some MOMMYSMASH to creepers.

So here's your obligatory super cute please-vote-for-me-on-Top-Baby-Blogs WATERMARKED photo. Pretty please click it (or the banner below) and me love you lone time. If you remember to vote daily I would love you even longer time ;)

P.S. Many of you asked how I found out about the Facebook creepiness. A reader told me. She heard about it from another blogger who was also impersonated. That blogger received a random comment on her blog telling her that it looked like someone had taken her photos. Just for fun...if you missed it, the admin of the page actually commented on my previous post...enjoy ;)

Not going to ask this time: people are freaking crazy

Top Baby Blogs reset their rankings this morning. Your votes have kept me at #4 over the last few months; thank you so much! Normally I would post a super cute photo of the girls asking for you to please continue voting for me, but I'm not so sure this time.

Why? On Friday night, a reader brought to my attention that there was a "Melissa" on Facebook (update: it's gone) displaying about 50 photos of Carina, myself, and Mike as her own. Her photo albums:

"Life of Me"? Yeah, no. That's me. Not you, crazy weirdo who spends their time trolling blogs and uploading tons of pictures to Facebook to pass them off as their own. Seriously...who does this?

It gets weirder. If you look at this person's friends list, they are all other fake profiles containing stolen bloggers' photos. Here's where Top Baby Blogs comes in; all of the bloggers are or were on the front page of TBB.

And then it becomes CREEPY. There were other pages, too, one of which showed Carina's photo (as well as photos of other TBB bloggers' kids) right underneath a bunch of photos of murdered children. This is what really freaked me out. The page has since been taken down, but all of the fake profiles have been reported multiple times and so far Facebook hasn't done anything about it. One of the other affected bloggers is in the process of figuring out who is doing this. I'm in contact with her and will keep you updated.

Top Baby Blogs has been great for me and my little ol' blog. I have met a number of nice bloggers and it brings me a lot of traffic. But, if being listed on there is going to send crazies my way? No thanks. The hits just aren't important enough to me. What do you think? If you were me, would you remove it?

I know, I know, I've already had a whole slew of people tell me that I should accept that this sort of thing will happen when I put my life out there on the internet. I am well aware. But that doesn't mean I can't take steps to hopefully prevent it from happening again. So, I need to get some things in order...download a watermarking program, and contemplate how much I want to share from here on out. Any other suggestions on how to avoid stolen photos or creepers?

Yuck. The internet can be a messed up place.

My Post-Partum Anxiety Treatment Plan

::breathe in::

Yesterday I saw a psychiatrist and worked out a plan for dealing with my post-partum anxiety.

::breathe out::

After I recounted all of my symptoms (which I'll describe in more detail at a later date) and family history, she told me that the things I'm experiencing are classic symptoms of anxiety. Our plan includes weekly sessions to discuss relaxation mechanisms and coping techniques and a low dose selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI). Yes, I had to type that all the way out because in my former life as a pharmacy technician it was my favorite class of drugs. Why? I have no idea...maybe because I filled prescriptions for them so often? :( Or maybe I just had a thing for that sad little pink ball who turns happy after taking one? (Anyone remember that commercial?) But I digress...sorry ;)

She put me on Zoloft which according to many sources is the "safest" for breastfeeding. However, she recommended that I pump for the first minute of each feed (before letting Aurelia nurse) and dump that first milk, which will have the highest concentration of the medication in it. Has anyone ever heard of doing this?

Say what, doc?

My self-imposed homework this week is to try to cut stressors out of my life so we are tackling the last of the boxes we still haven't unpacked from our move last year (yikes!) because CAN'T STAND CLUTTER and I'm gravitating away from blog posts that require me to post at a certain time (sponsored posts and Toddle Along Tuesday). Deadlines just aren't a good idea for me right now. I have to follow through with the sponsored posts I've already committed to, but won't be accepting any new ones. TAT will still go on as planned next week and we'll have one more the week after, but then there will be a break for I'm not sure how long. I hope you understand :)

Please bear with me as I start the journey to {hopefully} feeling better. Thanks for your support  <3


P.S. Part of me feels a little embarrassed announcing to the interwebz that I'm seeing a psychiatrist and am now on medication. Despite how far we've come, there is still so much of a stigma surrounding mental health issues in our society. If I can help even one person out there realize they need help or that they're not alone it's all worth it to me.

Favorite Posts of 2012

We're just hours away from a new year and I thought it would be fun to reflect a little on the year that is almost over. I spent a few minutes looking at my stats and posts that I've written during the last 365 days and have compiled a few things:

The top 12 most-viewed posts of 2012! In descending order of pageviews:

1. Easy Five Ingredient Stuffed Shells (OMG I can cook!)
2. I just can't keep this from you any longer
3. A peek into our living room!
4. A peek into our kitchen(s)!
5. Aurelia's Birth Story
6. Feel like I've been punched in the gut
7. I'm a breastfeeding in public hypocrite
8. Budget freakout & my NOO face
9. Carina's Nursery
10. One of the worst things about being pregnant
11. Things I Actually Say: LABOR EDITION
12. I think I've become a frumpy Mom

Best {and by best I mean most ridiculous} search terms of the year:

milf beauty contest
pretty girls with stretchmarks
boys gaining bloating balloon beer bellies
princess bitchypants
geeky birthing nightie 

My {personal} favorite posts of the year:

Super easy chocolate fudge - you'll want to eat all of it
The Pregnant Problems series
Dear Diary - a glimpse into my 6-year-old mind
More embarrassing things from my closet
Sense of dignity? Gone (TMI)
Teach your kids what breasts are for
I wish I had known it was the last time
Jennifer =/= Sophia: breaking down baby name popularity
HEY UNIVERSE CHECK OUT MY HAMHOCKS! (a Mike post)
My Classification Levels of Poop Severity

Happy New Year, friends! Thanks so much for making this such a great year. If you blog, what was your favorite blog post of the year? Please feel free to link up!

Three years since I jumped on the bandwagon

I began blogging on December 2, 2009 - three years ago tomorrow - to chronicle our attempt to start a family. It wasn't called "Growing Up Geeky" back then, it was "...And Baby Makes Three". I just went back and read my first-ever post and I remember so vividly the feelings I was having then. I was a bit impatient and even more of an over-sharer than I am now {if you can believe that's even possible}.

Raise your hand if you remember this photo! It was my header from 12/2009 through 3/2011

In my defense, at that time, the only people reading this blog were a handful of friends from the TTGP (Trying to Get Pregnant) Bump Message Board, of which I was an active member. I had no idea that I would still be blogging two children and three years later. My immediate family didn't know the blog existed until I found out I was pregnant with Carina and I began sharing it with friends last summer.

It became my pregnancy journal until Carina was born, and then transitioned into her virtual baby book, as I don't have the skills or patience to make a real baby book. I hope that someday my girls will be able to forgive the fact that I don't have their hospital bracelets and footprints arranged with shimmery naked baby stickers on stork-adorned card stock ;)

Anyway, I just want to thank you all for reading, commenting, offering help when I ask for it (and even when I don't), and sharing in our lives. I can't tell you how much it means to me to have you along for this sometimes crazy, always just-a-bit-messy ride.


P.S. To celebrate* I'll be having a new giveaway every few days until right before Christmas! *And because I accidentally overbooked and want to get them all done before the holidays. I'll be cutting way back afterwards due to the fact that I have virtually no time. If giveaways aren't your thing I hope you can forgive me ;)

Raising the white flag in my Google Reader

I haven't visited my Google Reader in weeks because it's just too scary. There are always 1000+ unread items and it looks like something exploded upon my screen. No matter how hard I try I can't organize all of the blogs I read easily and all of the scrolling makes me want to wring Google's neck.

So? I give up.

I'm starting over again with a new reader I recently discovered (thanks to my friend Tottums) called Bloglovin. I think it might actually help me keep up with the blogs I love to read!

Why Blog Readers will love it:

-It is super easy to group the blogs you read into categories. Just make a few groups (Favorites, Daily, Weekly, etc...whatever buckets you like to dump the blogs you read into) and then when you Follow a blog, the "add to group" button and menu automatically appears and you can file away to your heart's content. This always took me forever on Google Reader.

-The scrolling is SO much better. Yes, you still have to scroll if you follow a lot of blogs - BUT each entry contains a photo and just the first few lines of text. Note: I guess this might be a downside for those of you who like to read the entirety of every single post within your reader - but I find it saves me a ton of time being able to focus on content instead of my cursor-with-a-mind-of-its-own jumping all over the place.

What a blog post looks like in Bloglovin

-When you click on a post to read it, a toolbar appears at the top of the blog/page which lets you easily jump to the other new posts with a handy "Next" button. The toolbar also has Twitter, Facebook, and Pinterest buttons for easy sharing.

Toolbar

-You can opt to have an e-mail sent to you daily with new posts, or even an e-mail for each new post as it publishes

-You can explore other great blogs to read! There is a Top Blogs section with which you can sort by category and/or location.

Top Family blogs in the United States

Why Bloggers will love it:

-For each of your posts, there is a "Like" button underneath. If even just a couple people click "Like", your post might appear on the Popular Posts page or on the Bloglovin mobile app! Over the last week or so I've received a nice little bit of traffic coming from both (yay!)

-Other people can randomly discover your blog through the categories and search functions! It's basically a giant blog directory in addition to being a reader.

-You can easily update your blog information (including a thumbnail and description) once you "claim" your blog. If you have not yet claimed your blog, Bloglovin has a quick & easy tutorial you can use.

What my blog info looks like

If you'd like to, follow me there! Also, if you're already on there, or once you get your blog claimed, please link your blog in the comments below so I (and others!) can follow you, too. And no, this isn't a sponsored post. I just really like this website and think you will, too.

What reader do you currently use and how do you stay on top of all of your blog reading?

Random news & updates! Yay!

Happy weekend, friends! I have a few things to share with you. And because using numbered lists makes me feel accomplished and organized, here you go...

1. On Monday with my weekly bumpdate post I am going to include a linky list! I will do this on the 1st Monday of every month for the foreseeable future. Please feel free to link up your most recent bumpdate or monthly/periodic baby update! If you're pregnant and do updates for your little one, feel free to link up both! I hope this will be a fun way for us to check out each other's cute bumps, pregnancy progress, and adorable babies.

2. I have had a couple people suggest that I publish my Toddle Along Tuesday posts on Monday evenings instead of Tuesday mornings, because they have difficulty linking up or posting while at work. If you participate in TAT regularly, please comment below and let me know which you prefer, or if it doesn't matter. I am definitely willing to change to Monday if it is more convenient for the majority of you.

3. The BlogHer conference is coming up! I can't believe it's only 5 weeks away. It will actually be the first time I've ever left Carina overnight (eek!) So while of course I have mixed emotions, I am mostly excited. I will meet some of my amazing bloggy friends for the first time, hopefully learn a lot from the sessions, and finally get to have some me-time. And? I just heard that one night there is a party with all the McDonald's fries you can eat. SERIOUSLY. So.excited. I'll be introducing my three wonderful sponsors in the coming weeks! It is because of them that I can afford to go, and in style! Will you be there, too? Please comment and let me know.

For those who don't blog or do bump/baby updates, don't participate in TAT, and don't care about BlogHer, here's some super cute sassy baby for you ;)

Geekiest post divider ever & a question

I would venture to guess that my new post divider just might be the geekiest one out there. I asked on Facebook and Twitter if anyone could figure out what it actually means. A couple of you got it! I figured I should explain here since some of you have asked :)

In the Chemistry world, it's a simple equation. Mg = Magnesium, Ca = Calcium, and Au = Gold.

In my life, Mg = Mike and Melissa G, Ca = Carina, and Au = Aurelia. And no, we will not choose any future children's names based on whether or not they are easily translatable to an element on the periodic table. We're not that crazy ;)

Ignore the coefficients and ions - I just wanted something stoichiometrically balanced. Sorry for the throwback to high school chemistry! Are you geeked out yet?

Thanks to Krista from ArmyWife-Style for the idea, and to Mike for coming up with something that actually made sense with those elements.

______

Okay, now for my question. What in the world is going on with my comments? Some of you can't see them while viewing my blog from your mobile devices, and it looks like they have disappeared from a number of my older posts. I think I'm going to rip my hair out and curse myself for ever installing Intense Debate in the first place.

Please tell me - what issues are you having with my comments? I need to try to fix this.

Please help keep us afloat!

Thank you all so much for voting for me on Top Baby Blogs over the past few months! Because of you, I held onto the #6 position until all of the votes were erased, just now. Many of you have told me that you found me through Top Baby Blogs and I would love to stay there so others can find me as well. It is such a wonderful blogging community, and I have made quite a few good friends through it!

Pretty please could you help keep us afloat? Please view the photos below, and then roll your eyes, as you realize that I just made a really lame pun.

Just click here ~~~> or on one of the Carina bribery photos below. Then click on the owl to your left. It's that easy! I would appreciate it so much.

I have a Top Baby Blogs button over on the right sidebar, there, too. You can vote once every 24 hours. And if you do, I'll love you forever. Promise. But no sexual favors, sorry. I don't think the husband would approve. I appreciate every vote so much, thanks :)

A thank you and "became frumpy mom turd"

Once again, while looking through Google Analytics and my Blogger stats a few days ago I couldn't help but crack up at some of the random, nonsensical, and simply bizarre things that people are searching for that somehow lead them to my blog. Some of them are just {way} beyond me. I'd like to share some with you but first, Carina and I would like to thank this month's top 5 blog referrers!

LOVE YOU!

Top 5 Blog Referrers
Jenni at Jenni from the Blog
Kelly at Kelly's Korner
kjw at Baby W is on the Way
Caroline at Aidan with EOS
Ashley at The Stauffer Shenanigans 

10 Most Awesome Search Terms - (linked to the posts/pages they led to)
became frumpy mom turd
camoglam
engagement butt grab
first sex was at Disney World
ladies unzipping before and after
pretty girls with stretchmarks
bitchy cat pic
girls sport without clothes
hooker skirt
when I grow up I'm going to eat your family (WTF?)

What hilarious or weird search terms have led people to your blog?

Yep, let's do this - BlogHer'12

After some consideration and your words of encouragement, I have decided {definitively} to attend BlogHer ’12 in New York City. I have yet to be away from Carina for a night and haven't really done anything for myself in I-have-no-idea-how-long, so it's safe to say I am really, really excited about this. It will likely be my last chance to get away and have some {very much needed} girl time before this baby comes!

The awesome news:
My amazing friend Stephanie over at The Froggy and the Mouse has graciously offered to let me stay with her in her free hotel room AND New York City is practically in my backyard. Just a quick hour and 40 minute train ride, no need to worry about flying!

Woot! All of the below is taken care of!

In an effort to cover the cost of the conference ticket, travel, meals, and materials, I have done 2 things:

• Compiled a few partnership/sponsorship packages for companies or businesses interested in working with me.

• Discounted my ad space through August! All ad proceeds will go directly towards getting me to BlogHer. I have had 50,000+ pageviews each month for the last few months, so now is a great time to join me! Also, I just added a new ad size perfect for blogs (125x125) and to celebrate my going to BlogHer I am offering a completely free 125x125 ad for 1 month to the first 2 people who use promo code FREE (*sorry already taken, wow that was fast!) for the "Baby Geek" size ad. Yay!

Package prices are negotiable and I am open to other suggestions as well. Contact me as soon as possible so we can get the details worked out. There are only a few months before August!

Who is going to be at BlogHer? Post a comment and let me know!

Under Construction!

Eeek! My friend Becca over at Jumping Jax Designs just installed my new design! I hope you like it. I loved my giraffes and the bold colors but over the last few months the brightness actually started hurting my eyes. It's either pregnancy related, or I'm just getting old ;)  So I thought something still insanely geeky but a little more muted would help ameliorate that.

I have a lot of work to do tweaking things, matching colors here and there, and resizing, so please bear with me, friends!

P.S. No more "M" and "Mama G". We're Mike and Melissa. Or Missie. You can call me what you like ;)

Photo contest for Toddle Along Tuesday - 4/3

I've been getting a lot of questions about next week's Toddle Along Tuesday topic. We're doing something a little different this time around. The topic is your favorite photo. It can be of anyone or anything, taken at any time, the only rule is that it must be taken by you.


So what's different this week? It is going to be a contest! M will be my guest judge and he'll select his favorite photo out of all of your submissions. I usually leave the linky open all week, but this time I'll be closing it on Friday, April 6th at 11:59 PM EST. He'll pick a winner over the weekend.

The prize? A free 200x150 ad space on the blog for a month! I just started using this amazing new ad system called Passionfruit Ads. Gone are the days of sending payments and HTML codes over e-mail. You just input everything (banner/ad, link and PayPal info) into the site and then your ad magically appears on the blog! This will save everyone involved so much time, and I'm super excited about it. So I'm celebrating with this contest :)

My co-host will be Staci from Gatorette and Me. Check out some of her beautiful pictures!

Please let me know if you have any questions or concerns about the contest. Hoping to see lots of you participate! Have a great weekend :)

Sell out

Somehow this post is less painful for me to write if I sing "Sell Out" by Reel Big Fish in my head as I'm typing. Bear with me, please.

I know I've alluded to the fact that money is really tight a few times now. We've cut back quite a bit, I clip coupons religiously, and we don't buy anything we don't need. I haven't bought myself any new clothes since early on in my first pregnancy. (Quick background - unfortunately, post doctoral fellowships don't pay much at all, even if it's at an Ivy League University. My non-compete agreement from my company is rock solid and boooo they aggressively enforce it; it doesn't expire until the end of August. I've looked for other jobs but nothing I've found would have me making enough to pay for daycare and still have some to spare.)

For a little while we thought we might sign up for WIC and energy assistance - we qualify for both. We just kept on putting it off in the hopes that we could figure something else out. And luckily, I think we have. But, I have mixed emotions about it.

This blog has always been for me. First it was my outlet when we were trying to conceive, then it transitioned into my pregnancy journal, and finally Carina's baby book. Now I guess we've come full circle with the impending arrival of baby geek #2. My focus has always been what is going on in my life - with just a dash of product reviews and giveaways of items I think you all will be interested in.

My focus will still be what is going on in my life - and I will post just as much as I have up until now. The change will be this; in addition to my regularly scheduled posts, I will be posting maybe once a week about other products, stores/companies, sponsored topics, and giveaways that might interest you. It might not seem like that big of a deal, and it really isn't (as most other bloggers do this), but it's still hard for me to make this change.

Maybe I'm being silly in caring so much about this, and in explaining myself like this to you. Maybe the majority of you really don't care? I just would hate to turn you off, lose you as a reader, or have you think I've turned to the dark side or something. I'm not doing this to be greedy. And I promise I'm not going to turn my blog into an endless stream of commercials. I'm humbling myself before you and admitting that it was either this, or financial dire straits for us.

I hope you understand. And now for some super cute {and silly} baby.

Finally time to do something for myself?

I have never spent a night away from Carina. In her 14 months of life, I don't think we have been apart for longer than a few hours, aside from when I worked full time (from mid-June through August). I think it's about time for Mommy to have some me-time, don't you think?

I really really really want to go to BlogHer in New York City in August ::stomps feet:: BlogHer is a huge blogging conference where thousands of bloggers come together to connect, learn, and inspire (and let's be honest: party). I have made so many wonderful friends in the blogging community, and would absolutely love to meet some of them in person!

Reasons I especially would like to go this year:
1. New York City is only an hour and a half train ride away from me! Who knows if it will ever be so close again.
2. Many of my fantastic bloggy buddies are going and I am dying to meet them.
3. It will be harder to get away next year (and beyond) after adding another baby to the family.
4. The possibility of wearing some super cute maternity party dresses! Yep, I will be 32 weeks pregnant at the time.

What is standing in my way?
1. Child care - it will be hard for M to take the two days off of work to watch Carina, since the week after we were already planning on going on vacation with his family. We might have to consider some other options.
2. Money - it's a bit tight right now. My amazingly generous friend Tottums has offered to share her free hotel room with me, and the train ride is quite inexpensive, but the cost of the ticket, meals, materials, clothes - as I don't currently own any nice summer clothes that will fit me when I am blimp-sized, etc. will easily exceed $500. I don't know if I can justify that right now.
3. Mommy guilt - can I really be away from my family and all responsibilities for 3 whole days?

Sound off! Should I go? Are you going? Any advice/ideas/thoughts/dirty jokes for me? ;)

Bribing you with cuteness

Top Baby Blogs, a blog directory of which I am a part, just had it's quarterly reset. Thank you all so much for voting for me over the past few months! Because of you, I held onto the #10 position until all of the votes were erased, just now. A number of you actually found me through Top Baby Blogs. It is such a wonderful blogging community, and I have made quite a few good friends there.
So, could you please help me get back to where I was? Just click here ~~~>

Or click on one of the Carina bribery photos below. Then click on the owl to your left. It's that easy! I would appreciate it so much.

Can you deny this smile?

I have a Top Baby Blogs button over on the left sidebar, there, too. You can vote once every 24 hours. And if you do, I'll love you forever. Promise. I appreciate every vote so much, thanks :)